I wear UGG boots in winter because it’s fucking cold.
I also wrap myself in a blanket on the couch, and have a lovely area rug so I don’t have to walk on a cold floor. All these things are necessary to survive the winter; my house isn’t well insulated.
The problem with all this, is that I build up a static charge. So when I go to pat my beautiful sweetheart of a dog, I zap him. It’s audible and I’m sure, quite unpleasant. Often on the head. He obviously doesn’t like that, I think he’s taking it personally, and I feel awful. It completely cancels out the affection I’m trying to show him.
So the question for the Lemmy community is:
How do I discharge the static before I pat my dog? I have started shocking my partner (which he doesn’t like, but accepts over the alternative), before patting my dog. But as he’s out tonight, I have no human vessel to offer as tribute?
What can I touch in my house before patting my dog so that he doesn’t receive a shock?
Edit: standard Australian house and furniture
Another edit: I’m all the sheets to the wind so the engineering advice is not sinking in. But I’m loving the immediate response that I’d never have gotten on Deaddit.
Again: I can’t stop giggling at how helpful everyone is being and how short m, drunk and silly I am, in a house with apparently no metal
And again: I should probably take me and my baby to bed now, but a big thank you to everyone who replied. You’ve all been lovely. Lemmy is really a different space to ask these questions! I’ll be trying out many of your suggestions over the weekend; big thanks from me and my boy x
Final: thanks to everyone who responded. I did try the kitchen tap again last night and this time it worked! Mustn’t have built up enough charge when I tried the night I posted. I will still primarily zap my partner’s leg as it’s usually closer and doing it makes me laugh. It’s important he understands where he fits in the household hierarchy as well. I also learnt that American houses are very different (screws and radiators everywhere!) so that was interesting too.
Dryer sheets and fabric softener will reduce the potential for stadic electricity in your fabrics.
That’s very American advice I’m afraid. Here we just put our washing out until it catches on fire
Our air quality is so bad most Americans (even if they have the space for a clothing line) can’t hang their clothes to dry. They’ll come out smelling.
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Touch a radiator. Radiators should be earthed. You can also touch the screws on light switches and sockets, or your sink or stove. Any earthed metal, metal appliances (eg kettles and toasters) should work also. They have to be plugged in, but don’t need to be on.
Touch it with a key or something conductive to avoid getting zapped yourself.
This is it.
Also a humidifier may help. Static builds up more in dry air.
Easiest way to address this is to wear a metal Casio watch and have it touch anything metallic attached to a wall like door latch guides or maybe even coat hangers to dissipate any static electricity. Another choice is to grab the metal part of a key and tap them as well.
On the plus side, your dog must be convinced that you are a wizard. You need something to ground yourself on.
Hold your key’s metal part and touch some other metal that is earthed to discharge yourself.
By holding the key, you provide a way bigger surface area for transferring the charge, so it won’t hurt you.
You can touch a sink to discharge!
Internet says to touch the screws on a light switch panel.
They’re covered by plastic as standard here
They are screws holding the plate on, usually two flathead screws above and below the switch or paddle that them connect to the junction box which is how they ground you.
Covered in plastic
Covered in plastic how? Mine all look like this https://imgur.com/a/9EBDjPS
There’s these little white plastic plugs over screws, or an entire plastic panel over the top
Replacement covers are like $1.25 at the hardware store. If you’re renting, you can save what’s there in some closet and put them back when you move out.
Damn, I was going to suggest this, I do it all the time. Perhaps shuffle around and touch everything in sight until you find something that zaps and therefore discharges you. Once you find something grounding (zappy) touch that before you touch your dog.
I have a metal coffee table that I tap every time I get up. Maybe something similar if not that, like an end table next to your couch?
I do have a little table which I think has metal legs. Forgot it was there to be fair… Worth a try!
A metal doorknob works for me usually.
I too live in a hilariously dry climate in the winter and become a human lightning rod for several months at a time. Here’s what helped me: a quarter! I carry a quarter in my pocket all winter to touch to metal (I deeply hate getting shocked myself, especially the huge static charges). You’ll need something made of metal that is grounded, though. We have metal shelves or the aforementioned light switch screws. You can also look for screws on your washing machine, doorknob, dishwasher, sink, etc. Anything with a little metal should work. Then - touch the quarter to it, hear (but don’t feel) the zap, and enjoy your dog with no fear. Hope you can find something metallic somewhere in your home!
None of my things have accessible screws!! I’m in Australia so no quarters… And I’m not sure I even have physical currency in the house (Australia is pretty cash free these days (.
Fuck, I am just loving these responses. Everyone is so lovely.
You could also get a DIY power cable (the type where you screw the plug to the leads yourself). There you only connect the ground contact and not the live and neutral contacts. Now strip the end of the ground wire and place it where ever you want to be able to discharge yourself.
Alternatively, you can do about the same by just connecting a wire to any unpainted part of your radiators.
Jesus fuck… That’s a lot of science
No radiators
We don’t do proper heating in this cuntry
What about water pipes? Got any of them somewhat near to your couch?
You could also just buy a metal-cased lamp and maybe ask at the shop whether the metal casing is grounded. Usually it is.
Noop. My house is made of fabricated nonsense and plastic
Then the only grounded location that I can think of is the ground pin of an electric outlet.
Do you have a somewhat technically minded friend? Making a cable like the one I suggested is literally as simple as screwing in a handful of screws. So if you know anyone who’d be willing to make it, it’s not much effort at all.
I guess you’ll have to build a giant metal effigy in the center of your home at this point. Or become a wizard to better channel your new magical energies. It’s really your call now.
Bless you. Go with noodles
If by any chance you have wall sockets with the ground connection exposed, you could touch that before petting the good boy/girl.
Same thing for radiators and their supply/return lines. Those should be grounded as well. Also the sink.
I am not well versed enough in electrical engineering to say if this is actually safe, but telling someone to stick their electrically charged fingers in a plug socket is probably the most hilarious response in this thread
You don’t need to be versed in electrical engineering to know the basic fact that electrical sockets are impossible to hurt yourself with just by sticking your fingers near the holes
Static electricity is unrelated to the danger of a socket.
Furthermore, all the exposed conductors on a socket built in the last 50+ years should be ground. Otherwise people (especially children) would kill themselves all the time. Modern plugs won’t even allow you to reach the live wire without pressing against both holes at once.
However North American plugs have an enormous design flaw, where half plugged-in appliances can expose current on the exposed pins of the plug (which is why modern plugs have a partial rubber coating).
I remember getting zapped like that when I was a child, unplugging an old lamp that didn’t have the coating on the plug. It was just a scare fortunately.
Not in Australia, but good suggestion in some other countries!
Run some grounded wire around the edges of your couch. That’ll be constantly discharging you. You could also use an anti-static mat that’s grounded. And that would slowly discharge you as well. If you laid an anti-static mat over the armrest of your sofa, that would ground you as well. Run some copper from the inside of your UGGs to the outside so it makes contact with the ground, you can use copper foil. You’re going to be constantly generating charge in a low humidity environment, especially with the materials you’ve described using. You’re only solution is to discharge that potential with ground
Mate, that’s a truly insane solution that I don’t think I can muster. But thank you for the advice.
Increasing the humidity in your house will also help limit the static buildup. Just don’t increase it so much you get a ton of condensation on the windows
My asthma could not deal or I’d move to Queensland
I thought humid was good for asthma. 🫣
Two suggestions: run a humidifier. Preferably use a steam one with distilled water. The ultrasonic cool mist ones introduce any minerals and bacteria that are in the water into the air.
The easiest suggestion is to change your blanket. I’m guessing you’re wrapping yourself in a fuzzy fleece blanket. Synthetic fibers like polyester transfer way more static charge than natural fibers. Try looking for a cotton or wool throw. Or for something fuzzy, find a sheep pelt with wool on it. Even using a cotton sheet between you and your current blanket should reduce the amount of charge buildup.
A side benefit of changing blanket materials, is that any blanket that generates a lot of static charge also holds loads of dust and pet hairs. A less static generating blanket will stay cleaner longer.
The easiest way to discharge is to touch a metal faucet. If you have copper pipes, they’ll be grounded, but even just the tap water is conductive enough to dissipate most of the charge.