The Powerball lottery is up to $1 billion tonight. If you won it, what would you do?
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I’ll tell ya what I’d do, man. Two chicks at the same time, man.
That’s it? If you won the lottery, you’d do two chicks at the same time?
Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I were a millionaire I could hook that up, too; 'cause chicks dig dudes with money.
Well, not all chicks.
The type of chicks that would double up on a dude like me do.
Good point.
Go away, batin’!
Keep it a secret.
Exactly. Do as little as required by the laws of where you live and immediately get the fuck away from wherever you are and start the process to emigrate to a different country. Christmas and Thanksgiving will now be done over video chat.
You won’t fly your family in on your private jet?
Nope. They’re the ones most likely to murder me. Just me, my wife, and our cats. Minimal chances of murder. Except from one of the cats but if it comes down to it, I think I can take her.
Too many eggs in one basket
My wife and I were thinking about this last week. We were wondering about personal security. At least where we live, they like to make a spectacle of the big winner with photo op, publish name and how town, etc. We wondered if that would invite trouble for the winner. For instance, would people try to break in expecting you to have valuables? Would you be a target for kidnapping and ransom? What about your family or close friends, would someone kidnap them to get you to pay ransom on? Even if you immediately spent it all, would people still try, not knowing it’s all gone? I’m with you, I’d keep it as secret as I could.
The guy who won “over a billion” (that’s not what he got to keep) has headlines with his full name, what real estate he’s bought, lawsuits brought against him and he’s had to get body guards.
Because california forces a person to claim it and anonymity isn’t allowed.
Like a lot of trouble, the worst doesn’t come from strangers, it comes from people you know. By all accounts, what happens is that anyone who knows you comes out of the woodwork and suddenly wants a favor, or a small loan, or an investment in their brilliant business idea, and of course you’re the asshole if you deny any of them. If you can’t keep it a secret entirely, it’s best to at least lock up the money somewhere so that you can blame the big mean lawyer who is “making” you be responsible and not blow it all on your second cousin’s crypto app.
This user knows.
I would come back here and give 1 mil to everyone who upvote me and 2 mil for op
I upvoted you seven thousand times. Someone else must have given that many downvotes which is the only explanation for why your score is not 7000.
D’aww, thank you 😅
How would you know who upvoted you?
Keep a million for fun, everything else, buy a very conservative and diversified portfolio, borrow against it and purchase real estate worldwide in places with water access and least affected by climate change. With profits start funding antifa, anarcho-syndicalist, ecosocialist, and similar movements.
How to get assassinated by the CIA in 3 easy steps!
I like the cut of your jib
Yarrr
If you are buying real estate, you won’t be funding “antifa” or any of the other things you are fantasizing. Profit-bearing RealEstate is directly counter to all of those movments, and once they start threatening you, you’ll immediately pivot to funding the status-quo.
Sir, here is your pass for “things whose end justify the mean”, have a good day.
Until they eat you.
Pretty sure they would not eat the person funding them. Militant groups tend to like funding and toys for their activities.
More power to you comrade.
I would buy Reddit and convert it to a Lemmy instance.
You know everyone would be screaming about preemptively defederating, right?
Keep playing to get more rich.
Most professional gamblers quit just before a big victory. I won’t make that mistake.
THIS is the right answer. So many idiots in this thread.
I think you’re right. I’ll put my whole welfare check on powerball tonight.
Have you considered a payday loan so you could buy for next months welfare check as well? Don’t want to miss out for sure.
I would honestly just disappear.
If I had enough money that I can just go “fuck you”, that’s what I’d do. I’d obviously help my family financially, but probably not as a lump sum except to help them buy property to make houses on. But beyond that, I would basically be away and uncontactable. No one would know where I am and what I’m up to except maybe a couple times a year.
The bigger question is actually what type of charity I’d end up doing. I have some distrust for charities, so I’d want to take a more direct approach, so in all likelihood, I’d be helping a number of small creators I believed in to see if they could get a chance at establishing themselves better.
- Hire a fiduciary consultant/accountant to ensure the money is invested into accounts where I can live off the interest more than comfortably.
- Travel to all the places my wife and I want to go.
- Buy citizenship (via investor visa) in the best developed country that fits our lifestyle and life priorities.
- Buy a nice but not extravagant house.
- Buy all the non-essential stuff I’ve always wanted to buy.
- Hire a personal chef who will cook healthy AND delicious meals for us everyday, so I only need to cook when I actually want to.
- Give a lump sum to each of my immediate family members and my wife’s mom and brother. We trust them enough to not abuse the privilege of having a billionaire family member.
All of this +
- buy a 4x4 EV (if that exists)
I mean, I have won the lottery, multiple times…
But if I won the Powerball Jackpot? Honestly, I probably would hire a financial planner but not change my day-to-day. I like my life and already have plenty of money.
Obviously I’d have to tuck a bunch into my kids’ 529s because they would now be completely ineligible for financial aid.
Fiduciary! Dont forget the fiduciary!
Not tell anyone and just quietly retire. Spend as much time as possible with my kids as they grow.
-slides loaded briefcase across table-
I would like one (1) healthcare, please.
Sorry bud, if you want brand name paracetamol thats gonna cost you 2 billion.
Talk to a major law firm about accepting the prize as anonymously as possible. Take the lump sum -payment to the lawyer team and divide it into thirds. One third goes into a trust that I can direct friends and family to with instructions to offer assistance for major life events, weddings, funerals, education and the like. That way I never have to be the bad guy who says yeah, no.
The second third will get invested into low risk bonds so I have a stable income forever
The final third will become what people normally do with lottery winnings, new home, that kind of stuff
Among other things, I’d keep going to work. I enjoy my job. What I’ll really enjoy is every time someone tries to pawn off something on me that’s not actually my job I’ll tell them, “not my job”
Being able to go in to work without the same fears that usually accompany those living paycheck to paycheck even if they enjoy the work must be the most freeing thing ever. Knowing you are now untouchable financially so can take a stand if something annoys you enough.
I paid off all of my debts and have a few months saved up. Same feeling I think. It is the most freeing feeling I’ve ever felt. Like a mini retirement.
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Yeah I’m freelance and really love my work. It’s rewarding and impactful. Without any doubt these things are true. I’d probably cut back my hours a bit. But I’d just tell my clients that my services are now free.
I’d keep it a secret as much as possible especially in the beginning. Hire a financial advisor to invest part of it. Use some for risky high yield investments and some other for easy low yield. Some would stay in bank, some will be to open a business. Some fund for kids. Some for charity. Rest is for fun
This is exactly what I would do.
First start the process of getting a new wheelchair, my current one is 13 years old and leaves a trail of nuts and bolts.
That’s just its way of helping you find your way home.
