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I mean in his defense… This is an onion article after all. It’s only mostly believable.

I usually just respond “I’m a sustainer”.

That’s just medical too haha – $150 extra a month for dental, which covers 2 cleanings a year and X-rays every five. No emergency or orthodontic work.

Everytime I hear someone tell me how well our system works, it makes me convulse with fury.

$896 per month in premiums, and about $18k out of pocket so far this year in addition. Me and two kids.

Du

Have you seen those movies and what happens to the guys dressed like that?

Try again, Freddy / Jason / Michael / motherfucker

Cold, Jack.

Remember kids, if a person asks “What would you do if I asked you out?” – that person is asking you out.

And 6.1% of the worlds land mass..

You mean other people don’t?!?

I saw that guy in Forrest Gump!

And your bank account isn’t directly tied to a credit card, unlike a debit card. I’ve heard horror stories about people that have a $2k disputed charge that is just in limbo in a bank account until the investigation is complete and found in the account holder’s favor.

Credit card companies actively pursue fraud and will advocate for their cardmembers first, whereas the banks seem to hold some apprehension; at least in my experience.

Telling me you don’t?

Dweeb.

Ha! “Consultant / Technology Manager” – pretty sure he’s just working on the next buzzword buffet to justify his bloated comp package.

Oh well, gives me an excuse to link this Weird Al song that makes far more sense.

Genealogy sites.

Yea hey xitter my xitter now Pay to be free like me on xitter now Speech is only money on xitter now

…

Take it in the the xitter now xitter now

I keep telling everybody that says the US is full that I’ve been to the fucking Dakotas and I disagree.

Ooooh scrumpy – now there is a delicious treat I haven’t had in a while!

I’ll eat cereal when we get it for the kids but prefer granola, over Greek yogurt. Otherwise I go for overnight oats.