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Have you tried your local Swords 'R Us? I hear there’s a July 4 blowout sale this week. Use promo code Pond50 for half of your pond!
Have you tried your local Swords 'R Us? I hear there’s a July 4 blowout sale this week. Use promo code Pond50 for half of your pond!
Yes, it’s OK to leave a hot dog in a car. Hot dogs are best when served warm. The searing interior of your car will make it feel right at home.
That’s the spirit!
Instructions unclear. Tried to do a 180 degree turn at 80 mph. Trip was much shorter than expected.
The nice thing about being a pessimist is that you are always either right, or pleasantly surprised.
Soapscotch?
Many years ago I found a pasta recipe called “death by garlic”. It’s the only time I’ve cooked something and though, “ok, this is a good amount of garlic!”.
October 2025 me: what the hell, why didn’t anyone tell me about this before!?!
Someone recently told me they bought a “vintage truck”. I asked them what year the truck was made, expecting something from the 60’s or so…but apparently 1985 is vintage now. 😟
That’s a solid platform,! Where do I send campaign donations?
My fridge has a small particle collider, which smashes hydrogen and oxygen atoms together and creates water. Doesn’t everyone’s fridge do this???
At least it looks like he knows where claws should work…on the post and not the couch! 😂
That face when you realize the subway car IS the toilet.
Couldn’t happen to a better guy, right?
Hopefully harder to push around government types, I agree. But at the same time, easier to summon and unleash his mob without restraint. At that point, what else can he possibly lose?
It’s here to stay…for only $3.99 per month! *
*cost for monthly subscription only. Excludes fees for sending and receiving messages. Chat and others services extra.
Anyone want to take a bet, this is where we will be in 5 years?
And my axe!
Shrimp.
A friend pointed out to me that shrimp are basically the cockroaches of the sea. They just float around and eat fish poop all day. So gross and I can’t even.