She is a good coworker, meaning she knows her duties and has ample experience.
She is also a gossip and a person that will rant when somebody doesn’t greet her the way she believes she deserves to be greeted, or about how a coworker or manager wasn’t friendly to her. It’s both what she says and how she says it, like she was hurt.
I still don’t know if what she wants is that everyone stops doing their jobs when she enters the workplace to give her attention, because otherwise, apparently, people hate her. She is also very pretty. Not that I’d want a relationship with her, because this trait is very off putting.
I’ve already heard her saying I’m not friendly and I don’t know who should I react. I think it’s ridiculous to start giving her attention to keep the peace because I have things to do that pay my bills and it would be very draining, I cannot fake interest in things that bore me. I don’t understand why we can’t just do our jobs and go home.
you already know what you need to do… ignore immature behavior. nod politely when required. thats it. needy/problem people run themselves out of steam, if you just let them… but it could be a daily ritual.
it doesnt matter what she thinks of you. you have to treat her like someone elses toddler… nod politely, non-committal, generic comments when forced. and then flat out ignore.
Commit to the fact that you have to deal with her. That means sticking to what you know to be true, but understanding that she may have a poor reaction to that.
That said, you’ll also have to guard against potential misunderstandings, and be calmly clear when misinterpreted. Once you can accept the emotional and practical circumstances she’s putting you in, responses will come naturally.
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My mother is like this. She will never be happy and is addicted to being a victim. My mother actually pulled the victim card during Covid because her work was paying her to not work but she had to call every morning in case they needed her. She said it was worse having to call in the morning rather than work so was basically a victim because she got free paid time off while lots of people had lost all of their income.
Nothing you do will make this woman happy. Don’t try and be more friendly to her because it doesn’t matter. Better to act disinterested in everything she says and don’t answer personal questions she can twist and gossip about to other people.
“It’s not friendly to go up to people and tell them that they’re not friendly. If you want to get along with people here a little better, maybe rethink certain parts of your approach.”
Or just leave it.
Please read “21 Days to Resilience” by Montminy.
And once you understand it, then consider getting your co-worker to read it: you can’t convince 'em if you haven’t its meanings in you, to begin with.
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