For example:
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When you open a fresh jar of peanut butter do you only work through one side until it is completely empty then start on the other side?
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Or when you get those shallow tubs of hummus does it have to make it back home undisturbed? Then one of the baggers at the grocery store shoves it sideways into the bag completely ruining the symmetry.
My last bite should be of my favorite part of the meal. Finish my least favorite part first.
The greatest compliment I can pay a meal is that I couldn’t choose which part to make my last bite.
I do this too. It took a while for my wife to fully understand that if she wanted to try something on my plate, she better not wait til the last few bites
I used to do this but I have noticed one slight downside to this. My food goes cold by my last bite so the last bite does not have the optimal flavor.
My new thing is I try to eat my favorite part when I feel like the food is starting to go cold so I can still hit that peak.
I suppose that is one of the few upsides of being a fast eater.
I used to do this too, but then realized it was a big factor in my over eating. If there’s too much food on the plate then I don’t get to enjoy all of my favorite element unless I stuff myself.
Always eat the pizza crust. If you don’t, I will.
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People who don‘t eat th crust shouldn‘t be allowed to eat pizza. Don‘t like the crust? Don‘t eat pizza. Aren‘t hungry enough? Eat it with the crust an pack the rest.
I used to skip the pizza crust until I had a good pizza where the crust was just as good as the toppings.
That’s why I think people who don’t eat the crust haven’t had good pizza.
There is a huge difference in Italian pizza and whatever passes for pizza in some other countries. Anyone who doubts this needs to try an Italian / Sicilian pizza, it’s amazing.
The bread is much tastier, the ingredients pop in flavour and there is very little greasyness on the plate after eating it.
Also authentic Napelese (sp?) pizza doesn’t taste like you are eating an entire loaf of bread with tomato sauce on top. And none of that gooey cheese dripping grease all over.
Depends if the crust is good or not. Sometimes it’s just not worth it. There are some pizzas where the actual pizza is amazing and the crust is just boring as hell. Perplexing but I’m not going to force myself to eat something bland just because lol.
I give it to the dogs. They enjoy it.
Food should be finished at the same time. You work gradually around all of your sides and main dish so you have exactly one bite of each left, and then you finish your plate.
My SO drives me nuts because they can just eat the entirety of the main dish and then eat all of one side, and then all of another.
Eating one dish at a time ensures you’re getting the full, unadulterated experience of the dish.
But sides are made in consideration of the main course and are intended to be eaten/enjoyed together.
Why are side salads typically served before, and separate?
Because they are a separate course and not a side. They call it a side salad like Americans call the main dish an entree, we like to use words wrong.
Then the world is lawless chaos, and I can enjoy my meal one dish at a time.
Word meanings shift over 500 years, nobody is using “entree” wrong because it means different things in different cultures and has changed several times over the centuries. The way we serve and eat meals has also changed considerably.
https://languageoffood.blogspot.com/2009/08/entree.html?m=1
I like this write-up, it had plenty of historical examples.
I never want to eat in front of anyone who has replied to you so far. I’m a chaos eater. Nothing exists besides the current bite. I didn’t remember what the last one was and haven’t decided what the next one will be.
I’ve never seen anyone else ever do this and now I don’t feel as alone.
I eat this way and people look at me like I have two heads.
I’ve never wished I could eat in front of another human being more than I do right now. I just really want to trigger you with this and I don’t know why.
I eat like your SO, though I do mix it up a little sometimes, but it’s because I’m saving my favorite thing for last. I don’t want to end up with my least favorite thing at the very end.
I’d like to introduce you to me - I eat the starch, then the veggies, then the protein. Order of preference, descending.
Start with your favorite dish and when its gone move to #2.
That’s like ejaculating on someone’s face and then working your way to foreplay. If this isn’t against the Geneva convention it should be.
Food cannot touch on the plate. Each item must have a clearly defined DMZ between it and its neighbors.
I was this way as a kid. I’m not sure when I stopped caring.
Carry on with your DMZ, soldier.
Same. When I was young, I would RAGE if a pea so much as whispered to the mashed potatoes next to it. Now I reflect that I have bigger problems than this and don’t stress about it. Medication also helps. Somewhat.
Man, I’m the complete opposite. I tend to mix everything. As a kid I would even shape some dishes into a smooth rectangle after first crushing the potatoes and mixing it with the rest.
A friend’s dad feels so strongly about this that he has cafeteria style trays so each food item can have its own little area walled off from everything else.
Flavour L
My wife pours the milk into an empty bowl then brings the cereal box to her seat and pours it in one spoonful at a time. She insists this makes sense to do, and it’s the only way she’ll eat cereal.
Maybe she wants to keep it crunchy 🤷
Honestly kinda genius
Any time I buy chips and dip I have to always work from the top of the dip down, trying to keep it level all the way down. I have no idea why I do this, but it drives me crazy otherwise. If someone else takes a chip and digs straight down to the bottom of the tub I just don’t want it anymore lol
I am imagining the horrified look of the other people waiting to get some layered bean dip watch you take the top layer.
Well, a big shared dish of homemade dip is much different! I would never take the whole top layer off of a seven layer dip! My hangup is specifically about dips served straight out of the little tub from the grocery store lol
I do exactly the opposite, at least for shallow containers: I start at a side and go across, leaving the remainder untouched
I do this with ice cream
The 200-mile rule. Sushi is amazing but raw fish has to be trasnported somehow. If your eating seafood and are not within 200 miles of a body of water where it could have been caught… Probably best to pick something else.
Montana is not famous for its aquatic cusine.
And I too do the peanutbutter thing you mentioned.
Vast majority of fish you’re eating is flash frozen, even if you’re on the coast.
And the flash freeze helps to kill parasites on the fish, so theres is that too.
Alaska has a rule where a long as they freeze the fish on the processing boat (ie before it gets to the on-shore processing facility) they can label it as “Fresh Never Frozen.”
I mean, we don’t even do this within Japan. Most things are either flash frozen or kept alive until they can be served. Hell, on TV last night they did a segment on how a lot of the Tuna used by a major Japanese sushi chain (Sushiro) is caught in Malta, frozen on the boat, and then brought to Japan. I get the idea, but it’s not a good rule these days.
This is why I get imitation crab/lobster
Basically none of the fish you buy even right at the ocean is from that ocean unless you buy it right from the fishing boat (and even then…)
The only weird one I have is that I can’t do cereal and milk. 100% rate of vomiting resulted the two times I tried. I grew up on dry cereal and will, for all roughly two times a year I eat it, continue that. No, I’m not interested in adding water/ice/juice; that’s just making wet bread with extra steps. Doesn’t bother me that others do it.
Being poor and living out of a car in my early 20s for a bit rid me of any childish restrictions otherwise.
Finally, a reply that actually fits the question
When I eat soft candies, I always have to bite them into pieces in a specific way. Like if I have a cola bottle gummy, I will bite off the “cap” first. If I have a gummy bear, I will bite the bottom legs off, separate the head from the arms and then split the legs and arms from each other. The gummy cherries, always bite the stem off first. Gummy bats, the wings separate from the body. Gummy coins I usually try to split down the circle, i.e. splitting in two thinner coins.
Most of the time it’s just inside my mouth but sometimes I hold it in my hand and bite it off like that.
Also chocolate bars has to be eaten in the squares the bar is divided into. No splitting it across squares!
Bite their legs off first so they can’t run. Smart.
I read the first few words as soft candles and was so confused.
mmm love me some wax 🙃
I have an eating disorder and while I’ve gotten better…not that much better.
- A lot of foods are just dead to me. I miss bread.
- I weigh and log everything to .0 of a gram.
- At the end of the day I subtract the amount of calories I’ve eaten (to 0.01 kcals) from my calorie limit and those calories are banked in the form of egg whites so that I can always get bang on my calorie limit for the day.
- My main meal of the day has to take me over an hour to eat
- If I have to eat something that I can’t log with certainty, or I’m bringing and purging that day, my calories for the day are halved
- I don’t drink calories unless it’s alcohol
You know, I hadn’t actually written out these rules until now and like…oft.
That sounds tough to deal with.
Holy shit, this would kill me. I’m a mess when it comes to food. One day almost nothing, the other day storm of sugars, next one mostly vegetables, etc. I’ve never counted any calories and it honestly scares me, because I know I’d be fucked.
How good pickles are is inversely proportional to how whole they are.
- Whole pickles: blegh
- Pickle wedges: no thanks
- Pickle strips: on a sandwich, sure
- Pickle chips: yum, on a sandwich or alone
- Diced pickles: oh yeah, please
- Pickle relish: hell yeah!
Now all that’s left is to try a pickle smoothie to confirm your theory.
We’ve got to go all the way, time to vaporize pickles and inhale them
I know how to do this.
take relish (sweet or dill) and blend smooth. add pickle juice until runny. blend again. put about a 1/4 cup into an empty Soda Stream and pump it up like triple the normal amount. quickly cap and shake the hell out of it. uncap and suck the vapor out with a straw.
-I am a stranger from the internet and would never do this myself
You haven’t had pickles until you’ve freebased them
What you vaping bru?
Pickle juice, homie.
Dehydrater - mortar and pestle - rip a big line of pickle
Pickle beer is a thing.
Thats gotta be amazing
I have this but in reverse (and less extreme). I can eat a good pickle relish, but it doesn’t do much for me. Then, the delish goes up as we approach the whole pickle. The whole pickle is sour and crunchy. Perfection!
Haha, we must be arch nemeses.
Is relish basiclaly like the pickel equivalent to salsa?
Everything gets cut up before a pan gets turned on.
No plastic in the microwave. (Ceramics and glass only)
Range has to be clean before and after cooking.
Everything gets cut up before a pan gets turned on.
But… onions and mushrooms can easily cook as long as you might take to prep everything else, and they just keep getting better.
No plastic in the microwave. (Ceramics and glass only)
Absolutely. Unless I’m drunk, then a frozen burrito miiiight go in with its wrapper on. Fortunately, alcohol provides near perfect immunity to anything I’d be concerned about while sober.
Range has to be clean before and after cooking.
This is a good rule. Ten years from now when I’ve finally managed to adopt it, I am certain I will remember you fondly and hope you are doing well - how the time flies when you have a clean range, etc.
Edit to add - can’t believe I forgot this. I’ll eat any leftovers cold and any fully cooked soup or chili cold too. I just don’t care.
Also don’t care about reheating leftovers - except rice, I barely like it hot, so cold is a definite no.
I’ll add mine here, it’s pretty straightforward: TURN THE FUCKING MICROWAVE DOWN YOU NEANDERTHAL!
Oh I’m aware and if I have time I let them go for a bit first. But if I have to cut stuff while food is cooking then I have a panic attack. It’s just too much tracking things.
As a line cook, cutting up everything before a pan gets turned on is just good mise en place. You shouldn’t start cooking until you know you’re ready and haven’t forgotten anything. The whole process is way easier and more relaxed when you’ve got all the components together in advance
I like to eat green beans like french fries. I’ll even dip them and catch up and/or barbecue sauce.
Nothing on my plate can touch, especially if they are different textures. Textures are almost as important as flavor. This is the main reason why I don’t eat zucchini.
When I really like something I want it the same way every time. Don’t try to dress it up with new stuff, it was perfect before, I want it the same way.
If prepping uncooked meat of any kind, wear disposable gloves.
Cooked meat is fine to handle without gloves if needed but touching raw meat with bare skin is right the fuck out.
Unless you are talking about wild game meat the need for gloves means the butcher and the rancher fucked up.
You shouldn’t need gloves for beef, pork, chicken, or farmed game animals. You should only need to wash your hands after handling.
Wild game has additional requirements due to new diseases that spread via skin contact and parasites. If you are dressing or processing a deer you need to be wearing gloves and probably a mask for the later.
Can you quickly tell me why we need gloves and masks for deer? To protect us, I assume, rather than to protect the meat. I’ve never seen this done (in UK or Germany) whilst hunting so am now intrigued as to whether I’ve been taking unnecessary risks for a long time…
Yep, it’s to protect the hunter/butcher. Deer are known vectors for Bluetongue and Tuberculosis (unpleasant but not fatal thanks to antibiotics), but the new reason that has the CDC recommending gloves is Chronic Wasting Disease. There are no human cases currently but several studies indicate that humans may be able to contract it and given that it has no treatment or vaccine limiting exposure it probably for the best until more is known.
As to why you haven’t seen this? Well it’s a fairly new disease and doesn’t appear to have spread to the UK or mainland Europe. I didn’t start using gloves myself until ~5 years ago.
Thank you. That’s greatly appreciated - and a relief to know that I haven’t really been following poor practices for a few decades. Certainly gives me some food for thought though.
I don’t think you really understand how poorly funded and overstretched our agricultural inspectors are.
Secondly, who said this was just about disease? I mean a good part of it is, the rest of it is the fact that the texture of raw meat on my hands is vile.
I don’t know about agricultural inspectors but I’ve done butcher work. If they are reputable they don’t send out cuts that have been exposed to disease or weren’t purged(dosed) before slaughter.
As to not liking the touch I can respect that. I have more than a few partners that felt the same. It doesn’t bother me that much just due to the fact I’ve been handling it since I was a kid.
You know it is optional, right?
What is optional?
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